Are You Willing to do What it Takes?

There is no magic pill, no secret program, no super special technique to overcome an addiction. There are, however, steps and techniques you have forgotten or just never learned. The problem is, even with all the right knowledge and techniques at you disposal you won’t just automatically overcome addiction. There comes a point where you have to choose to work enough, believe enough, and be motivated enough to earn success.

I speak from experience on this one. Some days will seem easy. You’ll be able to easily resist temptation in a relaxed manner. These are the days you’ve desired to have for a long time, so when they come you feel relieved and happy. But you must remember that this will only be true on some days. Most days, all your life, will require work. They will require you to exert your physical and mental energies to stay clean. We must not be lured into thinking that we no longer have to work as hard as we did before. As long as you are on this earth there will be temptations.

I do no say these things to discourage but to prepare. You will get stronger with time and it will be easier to resist temptation. All I’m trying to say here is that there will rarely be a day that will not require you to work at staying clean. It takes constant and every day effort to maintain a clean happy life. Happiness will always require more work than the misery associated with bad choices.

See also  Addiction and Sex

So every day you have to wake up and decide you are willing to exert your personal powers to make the right choices all day. This will become a great habit and prepare you for the really difficult days ahead. I say this because some days will seem like “The Perfect Storm” in which every thing seems combined against you. For example, you wake up with little sleep, you’re irritated at work, your boss won’t leave you alone, the bills are stacking up, you get into an accident on the way home, you argue with your wife,you’re having a hard time controlling your thoughts, and finally you see an inappropriately dressed girl on TV. Well, in those circumstances it just seems like you can’t take it anymore and you are so tempted to give into temptation and go on a pornography binge. Believe it or not, even in these circumstances, it is still your choice to do the work to resist temptation and maintain a positive attitude.

How much you are willing to work is directly tied to how much you believe in the process of change, in a better life, and your personal powers to change. If you stop working and give into temptation or fall short of your goal it is simply because you did not have enough faith and motivation. How do you get that faith and motivation? You choose to have it. Nobody can give it to you or make you have it. There are people and sources that can help you to have it but it is ultimately your choice to have enough faith and motivation to keep working no matter what the circumstances are.

See also  Looking for Happiness in all the Wrong Places

Masturbation and pornography can make you feel powerless. It is true to these things bind you and restrict your freedom to choose. However,though it may feel like it, these things do not have complete control over you. You still have enough power to fight back and reclaim the lost ground in the internal battle you’ve been engaged in. It will not be instant but gradual and eventual. In fact, with perseverance success is inevitable. However, this requires work. Sometimes it will require you to exert all the energies of your soul to resist temptation, but you are not alone. Heavenly Father promises to bless you with the extra strength you need, after you have done all you can do. You will know when you’ve done all you can do because that is the time when his power kicks in and you will be victorious. He loves you enough to not do all the work for you but help you when you’ve done all you can do. Even if you are not religious, just do all you can do and you will be rewarded with success. You will feel an extra boost of power from a source beyond yourself.

See also  How to Stop Porn Addiction

Just keep working!

Ask yourself these questions with “10” representing the most:

1. On a scale of 1 to 10 how much do I really want to overcome porn addiction or any kind of addiction?

2. On a scale of 1 to 10 how much do I believe in my power to overcome addiction?

3. On a scale of 1 to 10 how much am I willing to work every single day to overcome addiction?

Answer these questions honestly. If you are lacking in one or more of these areas then work to improve the numbers and you will have more success.

Success will not come by accident or luck. It will come because you worked for it and earned it.

23 thoughts on “Are You Willing to do What it Takes?”

  1. Pingback: Drug Addiction » Blog Archive » Are You Willing to do What it Takes?

  2. Even now I am still addicted, even now I still act out and I hate that this is what has become of me. My exposure as a young child caused me to find a drug that would always be available. I think of it and the injection rush floods my body, to this day years and years later, I am still bound by my hands, hopeless. I have lied to the bishop, I have lied to my wife, I have lied to everyone. The efforts to conceal my addictions are exhausting and frustrating. How do I get rid of this scar, the scar of my youth still visible, the scar of countless hours of viewing pornography, I want to come clean and confess all to everyone, I want to live a full life, full of the spirit I miss so much and long to have. Where is the pivot of fate going to lie? How hard it is when there is no ultimatum, but I am slowly severing my ties with my heavenly father, left to myself to change, because of fear. I live in constant fear, and as the years go by I stay afraid.
    I am afraid of failure, I live my days out in fear. I am frightened to go out in public because there will always be pornography even in the smallest degree. This is the straw that will unleash the memories I have tried so hard to forget. I feel the adversary near me constantly, whispering me to seek it out, to dwell on it, he wont leave me alone. How am I to function? How am I to live a normal life, in fear? This time for me ia a sensitive time, where I tread a thin line of a rope, so easy to fall yet so hard to keep balance, I am out of practice and I hope it will get easier with time. Iremain afraid.

    1. I wanted to write to tell all of you that you are in for a long hard battle with this especially if your still young im not going to sugar coat this or make it seem like there is a miracle cure,there aint. There is a long hard war ahead of you. And there will be battles you win and battles you lose because you in a war with yourself and if at the time your strong soldier you will win, if you depressed, sad or just bored you might lose. Boredom usually causes us to seek something exciting. And since we have placed our minds up to a place of bliss, many times other things such as birthDAY PARTIES OR a walk outside just dont seem to to exciting so were bored. I Know because I am older and still fighting this war, I know because i’ve fel the same way , and I know because i too was exposed to porn at a young age. And I hated it; I , Iwish i had never heard or seen of it . It turns me into someone im not. IT’s like you want someone to find you because you are scared and always hiding things, you want like a father figure to come correct you, help you, to tell you your not weird. No one will come, but there a good side , At least you know you do want to do right, or you wouldn’t have looked up the website. To help you fight this will only be you, God will help you only if you help yourself. Remember theres no miracle cure, you will have to face it everyday, find yourself first–who are you and what you becom; if you good at something keep at it keep youself busy, temptation likes when your bored. Another way that will help is to help someone else with the same problem, you be amazed on how good you feel helping someone else and how it counters the temptetion. if you can help someone with an addiction it will help you conquer your own as well , try it. give someone a word of encouragement or maybe you story will help another person relate and repair, and remember you cant conquer it completely but at least you win the battle for the day. I dont Know but I wish you well because I am in the same war. you can fall just dont give up. gabriel

  3. In regards to what Paul said i feel the same way, i can relate to that exactly as if i wrote it myself, i was exposed to pornographic material at a very young age. I feel like it has destroyed my life and and i know god is helping me because even though my mind is foggy and my vision is a little blurry God helps me invision myself as the man i want to be and the man i strive to be focused, strong body, mind, and soul and pure thoughts. And when i am finished with my test i know im gonna be everything i want to be im going to have girls,money,love, and happiness and my suffering will be gone. The funny thing is that im a pretty good looking kid im physically healthy and i have a big muscular body anyone would look at me and think im perfect if they only were in my shoes they would know that thats not the deal. I feel progression everyday but its hard for me im only 17 and i feel like my testoterone is going to burst out of my veins. I have so much potential and im so talented everyone tells me im good at sports, im smart, im good at art, the art of combat, and i aspire to do great things and to be a movie director but i need this terrible addiction to pass by me. Im very confused in my life rite now and i feel like both God and the Devil are both trying to help me God in His way and the Devil in his, I just need to follow the righteous path and the path towards Gods ways. Every time i masturbate i feel like a chunk of my manhood is being taken away from me. I need to get myself focused and get my life back on track i feel my family and friends slowly drifting aways from me, please get back to me with some tips. Im not as scared anymore to admit i have a problem i tell most of my close friends that im trying to stop masturbating. I really feel like im gonna stop this time for my sake, the sake of God. Thanks for listening please get back to me.
    PS. is their someone that i can email directly like one on one help so i can get a more instant and effective results? Im only 17 I want to heal myself from this addiction asap, I have so much more life to live. Thanks

  4. I recently came to terms with my addiction and faced the truth that these conditions overwhelm me and are deteriorating my lifestyle. Im only 18 years old and since the age of 12 I’ve experienced a long and losing battle to masturbation and pornography addiction. Its gone beyond the point of internet pornography towards other sources but not to the extent where it is noticeable by anyone but myself. After reading several articles from this website I realize how much of a stranglehold this addiction has had on my life socially and recently recognizing its impacts on my academic career. I recently failed a class in my first year of University. Not because I’m stupid, but because i didnt exercise my full potential. For a while now I’ve recognized that this addiction has impeded my progress throughout school and although I’ve experienced good situations in academics, its beginning to take its toll. Now more than ever do I have the motivation to persist and overcome this. I know I muist develop a system in which I am motivated to prioritize and persevere without pornography, sex or masturbation on my mind. Although this will be a tough journey, I am confident that I can do it as long as I stick to my convictions, stay motivated and change into a solid routine that supports my real life goals.

  5. i used to love wathching porn i always thought that woman was god’s gift to man i use to belive that sex was given to us to enjoy i would always talk of how the great solomon had 500 wives so it cant be wrong. I recently started reading my bible again and i came across a pasage saying that “the man who even thinks in a lustfull way is condem cause he is committing adultry in his mind and will be condemmed” This got me thinking about my own mind state. I find porn so exciting and i love to watch it but now im very concious of my lusting and i feel i must stop this obssesion to save myself from hells damnation. Despite this i find myself even more drawn to it. Ill sit and watch it all day with two sets of conciouses 1 of sheer enjoyment; 2 of real fear of gods words. i feel so confused im 41 years old and have from a very early age had a real love of sex, porn, and the feminin form. I think about sex evry day , i look at women in a lustfull way everyday and have done for many years. But porn is my access to plenty of “femminin form and i cant stop mysely from indulging. Im so confused and frustrated cause i feel it is wrong in gods eyes but i just cant resist having a look. Its not about being desperate with me in terms of not being able to find a partner cause im in a relationship and its never been a problem . Its just that i enjoy watching porn but for my spiritual well being i know i must stop i would appriciate any help you can offer

  6. It all started when i was 11, when a freind of mine described his experience with masturbation.This new discovery as he said was his ultimate pleasure and had asked me to have a try.That day 20 years ago was the begining of a painful journey.I masturbated most of the time but i was lucky because i had lots of friends and a big family so i sometimes didnt have the space to think of it.Thinking back of those years when i used to experience the side-effects of masturbation which i was not aware of makes me feel sad.Low self-esteem, fear, anxiety, fatigue and dirty thoughts, you name it i had them all.Now my battle to this destructive habit is improving.There are times when i don’t masturbate or view any pornagraphic materials and in those days i experience happiness and the joy of life itself.I am extremely confident, healthy looking, productive, organised with high level of self-esteem..One week, two weeks or sometimes 2 months without masturbating or viewing any pornographic images and i m high in the sky.During this gap i declare to myself my triumph of overcoming this destroying habit and that i will never do it again.And before i know it, i am back to it again and again and the journey begins.I would read the effects of this addiction from the internet so that it encourages me to i quit, but it only lasts for few days and i am back to it again.I must admit i am closer than any other time to get rid of this addiction.I can feel it in the back of my mind.Something inside me is getting stronger and stronger….To all my fellow human beings who have been traped by this habit i say DON’T GIVE UP AND GOD WILL BE WITH YOU IF YOU TRY YOURBEST…….
    The journey continues

  7. I was also exposed to porn at a very young age. I do blame some problems on it but it is not the root of my evils.
    I dont think god will condemn anyone for masturbating. You will condemn yourself. Masturbation however is impure and leads to impure lustful thinking of women. I myself masturbate regularly and I am trying to overcome the addiction. It’s not easy when all this stuff is right here on the net. I have lasted a couple of weeks without doing it. but than, I might come home drunk, and…. you know the deal. I feel maybe that if we take it day by day, starting with our thoughts and emotions, we may have a chance. Often, when I have the urge to m.bate, i ask myself…” what is the reason behind this desire?” is it lonlieness, emptiness, lust… what? I think its a mix of all and plus some more. This culture(america) and others have a tendency to portray women in a pornographic manner everywhere we look and this is very harmful to all. Women are looked at as thing to be had… we need to change this…

  8. Pingback: how does secret porn effect a marriage

  9. I’m trying to overcome masturbation. It takes away lots of things in a person’s life, especially spiritual power. I always blame myself for masturbating everytime I finished doing it. Its like a spirit tempts me and I could feel that spirit around me. I’m very spiritual and this is my only weak point in life. This spirit exploits it too much. Its a way the spirit gets me to sin against God most times if he can’t succeed in different ways. I am ready to stop now. I must stop and drive this spirit away. I don’t think of sex anytime i’m in church. I feel like I’ve gained more power. Immediately I get back home, I feel the urge to masturbate right away. That spirit takes away lots of spiritual blessings away from me after I get them through masturbation. I must stop masturbating. I promise myself to stop. Once and for all.

  10. Since I was 13, I have had this “addiction” and it seems never to end. Everyday I see something somewhere that tempts me and after a while it just rips me apart. This is the first time I have ever said it out loud… It keeps taking control of my life and I don’t want this anymore. After seeing what these people on this site have written I finally realized that I am not alone. Cause recently I feel like an outcast to the people around me. I just… feel like as soon as I am doing good some problem rises out of no where and throws me back on the ground. I really feel like I have no fight left inside of me. But coming here has shown me that I can keep fighting and I will pray for you all also. Maybe God will pull us all out. I hope so because I am on the verge of destruction inside of me. I have to end this on going curse that has plagued my soul. I must stop masturbation. I not only promise myself but quietly promise my loved ones and God. Please God get me through this…

  11. I have to agree with what most of the articles are saying…Mastubation and porn addiction is ruining my life. I am blessed with a loving family and loving relationship. Both these addicitons have somewhat distorted my mind and thinking. It always makes me feel guilty and I am never happy each time I succumb to my temptations. I feel really bad and sorry to my girl friend. Dhe deserves someone better. Not some porn addicted guy. I know what I did is wrong and I am determine to get things right. But each time I decided to quit, my addiction pulls me back unexpectedly. Be it from stress or whatever. Not only that I am also ruining my studies as I am doing things which I am not suppose to do… i know what I do is wrong and I am in the process of correcting things. I am so so sorry to myself and evryone around me. Hopefully I’ll find enough strength to pull things around. I WILL BE ABLE TO DO IT..!!

  12. Although some of us may be religious, its important to remember that not every one here is. Ive been struggling with porn addiction my whole life and masturbation. I will never give up fighting it, and I know this perseverence in my soul is a good thing. No matter how many times I relapse or make mistakes, no matter how big the binge, I will never quit my resolve to quit. I will quit this and one day, one day I will succeed. Even if it takes me my whole life. This is what makes a man. May we all be helped.

  13. It’s good to know that i’m not alone. I’m writing this becasue i feel and hope that any kind of confession is health, (even if just my first name is mentioned) and it’s a step towards overcoming this addiction. I am so ashamed of this addiction that, as i write this, i am just now starting to realizing how severe an addiction i actually have. I want to be brave and confess this addiction to people close to me because i hope that such an action will strengthen me. However, i do not have the slightest courage to do so. I am scared shitless. I am just realizing this now. I made a goal to now masturbate for 30 days. Even if i accomplish this, i am afraid my future will still consist of this never ending battle. I’m 20 years olds now. I got to do something about this.

  14. I have been introduce to porn at very young age. I was playing on a playground with my friend and his friends and one of them were looking at a porn box cover. I was immediately turned on by the pics even though I thought they were disgusting. I took the box cover home and before you know it my hormones were raging and I couldn’t resist to masturbate by looking at a freaking box cover!! 6 years have past and I’m 18 now. Just like all of you it too has gotten worse for me. I feel so alone and weak. I feel mentally confused about things. I keep most of the negative thoughts inside and I know its having an affect on me. I can’t even conversate with people anymore because I’m so anti-social because I believe the addiction has caused it. I feel so hopeless because now I don’t know what to do with my life. I don’t have a job, I’m not in school, I’m only staying at my sisters house because of my mom but I feel like I could of been and done much more if I hadn’t been so addicted to porn. And when I masturbate I feel like someones watching me like telling me don’t do it, then I always feel guilty afterwards. But then theres a new day and the cycle just repeats itself. I think about porn or females then I start doing my daily search. I’ve had enough of it and want change so I can get out of this predictment I have been for the past 6 years and live the life that I was meant to live before everything got screwed up. I hate having no one to talk too and then resorting to porn to fulfill my happiness. I can feel my energy just slip away each time I do it. I’m so tired of feeling lonely, hopeless, weak, and I know the addiction has something to do with it. thank you people for not making me think I was alone.

  15. Wow!

    It looks like we all have had the same beginning. I was 12 and a boy a year older than me told me about masturbation.

    It was such a release for me, I had developed early so I had “success” the first time. And that started a habit that has lasted almost 40 years. Through 2 marriages. This second one, she discovered what I was doing and confronted me. No one had before her. It has been a struggle of success and back sliding to get this under control.

    But what a difference it makes in my life, the days I don’t look at porn which then leads to be masturbating. The whole cycle is so frustrating. But as I have longer and longer periods of time when I don’t look and don’t masturbate, I gain a very clear perspective. My self esteem goes up, and I feel very “normal” Like one of the good guys. When I slip, I feel the pull into that dark, fearful place like when I was a teen growing up.

    I am very social, and love our friends and family. Funny, I thought my masturbating didn’t show, but my wife can tell just from my attitude, if I have been at it. Now I see what she sees in me. And I like the guy I am when I am clean. He is great. And on the days that I am feeling tempted, I can stop myself, and have some persecutive. I can see that I value my good life more than the one where I fear, hide and just live in a way that is not who I am at my core.

    Having the choice, which is really about having the control over your own life, is what this is all about. You have the freedom to choose to slip down into that place that feels good in the moment, where the fantasies sweep you away from what ever is causing you pain or frustration. But then you finish, and you are alone and Surprise… the problem is still there. Better to grab the fear and the problem by the throat and get a good firm grip on it. Because you are bigger and stronger than that fear. Listen to it, see into it, then solve the problem, find the success in conquering the problem.

    You will be amazed at how good you feel and how that need to masturbate unendingly started to devolve. That you can sucseed, and be your best. Now that is power, control, and what I feel is being not just a good guy but a great guy.

    Enough said… go out and win the day, just for you!

  16. I used to watch porn when i was young thinking it was normal and everybody did it. As I grow older I found it wasn’t normal and it wasn’t moral and not everybody watched it. I have tried and tried to get rid of that habit, but to this day I’m still struggling. I stay clean for several weeks and I feel good with myself but then someday I feel tempted again, sometimes for several days, and then I indulge myself and watch porn and then when I finish I feel terrible. This guilt is horrible, I love God and I feel I’m failing in my faith. I’m gonna keep trying and trying and i’ll be praying for all of us who has this problem. Let’s all of us who believe in God to pray to God to give us strenght and determination to stop with this serious problem and be worthy of his love and salvation. Thank you all and God bless us.

  17. Just a message to you guys who are young and feel bad about masturbating. it is natural to feel bad because it is your self- concience, that means you have a good self concience if not you woundnt feel bad after. I am sorry you were exposed at a young age to porN, I was too, but I cant change it I have to adapt and find a way to live with it, and it not ruin my life. Since you are adult now you have to face it with an adult manner. Be smarter than the computer, or tv think what you for the day if you cant beat it outsmart it, plan you day with you masturbating at he end of the night, so now you have set in place , take care of all your other engagements normally without thinking of end of the night, keep yourself busy so busy that at the end of the you still so busy or tired that you just simply have no time and it will wait till tomorrow. put all priorities first , do homework, chores , all other things that have been put aside. and now at the end of the you put it aside because your tire or just dont have time. make you mind think its just another chore and it just cant or wont get done today, just wait. then plan your day again doing the same place it at the end of the night or say I have to wait till friday, then i will. but just keep putting it off, and do other things. try it see how long you can last it is not full proof but i bet youll get alot of things done and you will learn how to use you mind to benefit you instead of hurt you. again i dont know you, I wish you well, I fighting in the same war. you can fall, just dont give up. Gabriel

    1. Firstly I want to say that this site is the best I’ve seen on the subject. I have had some of these problems and want to share some observations. I hate the feeling of slavery to pornography. Porn does nothing to reflect the reality of good relationships. It is pure fantasy that uses the mostly male tendency to be aroused by the visual. That’s how we are made. The net has made it all so easy, too damned easy. We may go there to see beauty but it turns most times to ugliness very quickly. It drags you down, it treats people like meat. It only gives one very limited aspect of sexual life. Some of the things I’ve seen haunt me, frighten me, make me feel physically ill. I am a Christian, the best thing that has ever happened to me. Unlike some I don’t see masturbation as a sin. This is something that started for me at 14 and was totally innocent and beautiful. It is how I learned about myself, my orientations
      and needs. It was the loneliness of the solitary act that made me want to share the beauty with a woman. These things are not possible for a school boy and if they were, are probably not the best outcome in practical terms. Most men have to wait till they are able to take responsibility before they can engage in sexual relationships. Men are victims of their bodies. We are given a lifetime of sexual potential of which we need a minute amount for procreation. Meanwhile our bodies produce large amounts of semen that have to go somewhere. I am convinced that we need regular expression of some form to be healthy, physically and mentally. We are harmed more by feelings of guilt than the act. As in all things sense and moderation are called for. A good and healthy loving relationship is the ideal but we all know this is reliant on factors such as age, health, lifestyle and other pressures. Getting back to porn I also want to say to you all, have you ever thought about the lives of the women on these sites. Do you know that they are often sex slaves forced to perform for masters who pay so little that these women find it impossible to reunite with their families. You see , they are often from poor countries and are offered good jobs only to be trapped. Sometimes their families and children are threatened if they speak out. I would say to any woman thinking about working in the industry – please think carefully, you are letting yourself down and all women with you.
      There is one way I found good to stop looking at this sad stuff and that was to have a diary or calendar where I marked every porn free day. I t gave me something to be proud of, to work toward. Let’s face it, we are basically on our own with this. Sites such as this help but who else can we saddle with it. Our wives? I can tell you they don’t always understand and can see it as an attack. Friends? – maybe, but I don’t want to involve others unless I really have to. Church leaders?- well , while they say they are there to help some things are just too personal and I am not so keen to do this. It would be good to have an organisation similar to AA, even by email. My only purpose for writing this is to perhaps help someone to feel not so much alone

  18. Addiction is awful in any way. Most scientist will say that there is nothing wrong with masturbation, that it is a healthy thing to do. Well, I don’t believe that. I think the whole idea of it is wrong. It screws up your perception, it can change your personality and your characteristics, it makes you prone to other addictions eventually, it is against religious teachings. Oh I could go on, I truly could, my life is just one big exhausting day because of my addiction to masterbation. I have no determination and if I do then it is lost quickly because “it’s just not me to be determined”. I think that it is an afwul trap to get in, masturbation and porn. I’m only 14 years old. I don’t watch porn often but I do masturbate from 2-5 times a week. I think the web has a lot to do with it too. I perseeve the world wide web as a magnifying glass. Looking at one end of the spectrum, it can be used for good and has made work moore efficient. Well, that’s one way to use it. Look on the other side of the spectrum and you can use it to engorge on lustful desires. Another thing, I think that addiction, when your conscience tells you you shouldn’t be doing it, brings so many lies and deceptions into your head whether to rationalize sin or satan’s way of telling you that you won’t get out. He tells you that one can, but you won’t or just tells you that addictions are there to stay and there isn’t anything you can do about them. When you are in a trap such as that, it gets exhausting to think of ways to get out of it. Think of it as a jail cell. If you are one of those people who was exposed to porn or masturbation at an early age, either you looked at it an your instincts tell you that it is so dark and bad that you shouldn’t go there, if you choose to go in, well, your just looking because its a new thing you have never seen before. Since most people that visit this site I am assuming have a problem with addiction to porn or masturbation, then you chose either to come back to it after you left screaming like most kid do, or you walked in because it caught your curiosity. Either by curiosity, or by accident, or by someone telling you that the cell is a cool place to hang out and you can come and go whenever you please, you entered it. you close the the gate, expecting it not to lock, then you find that the cell is dark and musty. The cell isn’t all that bad though. It has decent food and everything you’d need to live without much work. Hmm I guess it is a decent place to hang out when you are bored. Most likely, you will leave thinking that jail is for bad people and you aren’t supposed to hang out in there, or you just think nothing of it. You might think that it is, in fact a great place to go because it is the coolest club house or perhaps that everyone else goes there occasionally because it seems so…fun. A couble of time periods later, you come back, whether by the same curiosity, or a different curiosity. Perhaps something sparks your head at school or work that tells you to go to the jail cell because someone talks about it, you think about it because you are bored, or whatever it may be. The thing is, you come back to it. Over time, how ever long or short that time period is, You start to go more often, until you live there. You keep your house because you don’t want anyone else to know. By some means, you make sure that no one knows that you live in a jail cell. How sad is that? You think though that everyone else likes it so why not live in it, but you don’t want your parents, siblings, or spouse to know because it is a sad, but comfortable way to live. Either, by now, you live in the cell, hoping to get out, but hey, some guy left the door locked, you can’t get out. ( The person who locked it is the owner of the jail house, Satan) He wants to collect as many souls as possible for his misery house. Anyway, you are trying to get out because it is an awful feeling to live there when there is so much better in the world. You see happiness outside of your jail cell window. It is a tiny window, but you can see people who are free. Man you wish to be free. But, alas, you are trapped in this cell. Well time to get out. The Devil says, what is so bad about living here? (By the way, God and the Devil never make you do things, they will influence you but, they can’t take you freedom away, you do that by listening and practicing the Devil’s teachings, whose goal is to trap you, to make you miserable, like unto himself.) Anyway, he tells you lies, lies, lies. He is the father of lies. Where are the keys you wonder. They are no where to be found. So you take a swing with a pole at the gate. What the…. it wasn’t even locked. Remember what I said about the Devil and the fact that you lock yourself in, maybe without knowing, the Devil puts those imagenary locks on your addictions. You think they are real. They aren’t. After leaving the cell, you think that it wasn’t so bad. For any reason, there are many, and anything tell you to go back is untrue. A deception. An extremely real deception. The Devil shouts you these untrue things. He has a very loud influence. Get as far away from that jail house as possible. You will still hear him, but come back to your loving Heavenly Father. He is always happy when you have freed yourself from sin. I hoped this little metaphor has been of some use to you. I just needed to express myself, ya know? Inside that jail house is packed full of lies, misperceptions that maybe you are accusstomed to so much that you don’t even consider it to be a key in your problem. For example, telling someone you are trapped inside helps greatly, especially if you tell them before they find out. Because, when you tell someone yourself, it shows that you are really ready to go the lengths to get out of the jail house however discouraging or tempting it is to stay. So, tell someone who will listen. I still need to tell someone. Possible rationalizations that I have thought up of is perhaps that you will get judged. That may be true depending on who you tell. Try to tell someone who won’t judge you. One thing that really gets me is that, people expect a lot from me, so how can I tell when I have done something that has ruined me. I have an awful feeling when I disapoint someone. You and I must break through the pounding thought of what will change when I have to stop and what will others think of me. Humans are subject to habits. Good habits usually require more work and discipline, which is why they are considered good. Bad habits are caused when people find an easy way to do something. For humans to break bad habits, that takes will power. A lot of habits are hard to quit because people don’t want to change. I am not saying this to discourage, I need to do it too, but what I would suggest, a little thing to help, is that we get in the habit of changing. You know, start with the small things like going a different route home, then go bigger and talk to people that you would never talk to. Maybe, start praying if you haven’t. Start reading scriptures. Maybe walk with your family. Aquire a new look on life all together. This will take a bit of initiative and you would have to work on that. But that is what we are trying to aquire, Initiative. Initiative to change, confess, overcome addictions. You get the point. Again, thanks a bunch for letting me rant. It made me realize a few things I have forgotten. By the way, you’ll find happiness in doing good. Serve others, do nice things for others, don’t do bad in the world. Lose yourself in service and you will find yourself. Try it, perhaps it will work. May your endeavors of righteousness succeed. You can succeed. So can I.

  19. hi my name is hank and I am addicted to porn and masterbation. I started masterbating since I was 16 years old. At the time, friend of mine suggested me to do so since i was having wetdreams in a regular basis. he told me to start doing it so that i won’t have deal with dirty pajamas. I thought masterbation is ok until I was 19. by the time, i was 16 I was also drinking in a regular basis and started smoking weed when i was 18. I gave up drinking on august 2005 and the smoked the last was april 2007. By the time. i was 20, i became religious since I always feared god and i found out that these things are prohibited. I wanted to be in a rightous path and looking at porn and masterbation is doing things that are not permissible. I understand that what I m doing is taking me towards hell fire yet the physical desire and dependency is not letting me stop my ways. since I was 20 , i have been battling masterbation. there are good times and there are bad times. the most i went without masterbating was 4 weeks and then i failed. I go 2,3,5,7 or ten days before i fail. but when i masterbate, i do it 4 t0 5 times to satisfy myself. someetimes, i noe i m going against god while i m doing it but the devil gets the best of me. this site is really helping since i see there are also other god fearing individuals who are waiting to curve this appetite. my friend blocked the porn for me yet i found ways to go around it and now the software has stopped working. i feel ashamed to ask him again. every1 thinks that i m a good religious man but i noe my sins and i dont publicize them until now . sometimes my eyes become tearful knowing that the hell fire waiting for me since there is no guarantee that god would accept my repentence since i always go back to my evil ways. hopefully, there are those of you who are addicted to these nasty things can helpful find my salvation. i found this website a week ago and before that, i refused to admit that i was an addict but then i had an epiphany that i cant be the only one struggling from this sin. I would my fellow brethren to share their experience so that we may one another. other people stories strengthen me so that i actually just went 2.5 days without it and i succombbed it to again ( may god forgive me for my sins). my fellow addicts strive and ask god for salvation. Amen

  20. I am really glad I found this site. This will be the place I come everytime I am on the internet and temptation strikes. It seems that the only thing that helps sometimes is just to say “I don’t want to do this” and talk to someone. But if someone is not around then I will always know that this site is here and there is some testimony to read.
    Praise Jesus for dying for our sins! And praise God for his mercy! And praise Him for sending his holy spirit to help us.
    Once again this site is great. It will help me keep focus away from our fleshs evil desires.
    And to you who is struggling with the same as I. I just prayed for you. And hang in there, keep fighting! Your God loves you! He hates sin. Let us learn to hate it too!
    May God be with you,

  21. i too hav suffered from the evils of masturbation. it all began at the age of 6. i was watchin from dusk till dawn. during some bar scene a woman in a bikini came out and did an erotic dance. i ran to the back of the couch and masturbated. ever since then i have suffered from this curse, but do not pity me, for i have chosen this. just like i chose to masturbate i have chosen to stop. no more will i be succumbed to this wicked lie, to societys corruption nor the ignorance of my friends. i see no how this addiction is ruining my personal and social life. in time through God and will power, i am wining this war. for i choose to deny temptation.

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