Addiction and Sex

It’s nothing new these days to associate addiction with sex. It was before thought of as a figment of the imagination but people in general are starting to understand it is actually real. There are powerful biochemical processes that people simply cannot ignore. Sex and addiction are certainly related so far as sex is misused.

Sexual addiction is an often misunderstood term as most people assume it means someone who is addicted to having sex with others. While this is true it is not the complete definition. Sexual addiction is any kind of addiction pertaining to the sexual organs. Arguments against this seek to narrow a broad definition for reasons that do not help those seeking to understand sexual addiction in general.

I wrote a post some time ago called “Your Body has been Hijacked by Addiction” and the main purpose was to point out the powerful effects of misuse of sexual organs and bodily processes. I can call it misuse for several reasons but I will concentrate solely on the loss of personal control as evidence of unnatural habit.

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Sex is powerful for a reason. It is not the reason most think. If you break it down into simple scientific and logical elements it is easy to see the sequence of necessary events in the body’s arousal process. We can of course CHOOSE to be “turned on” by anything. However, the natural born instincts tell us to be attracted to the opposite sex. The reason for this is two fold, recreate and bond.

Let’s concentrate on the bond part. If you misuse the body’s sexual processes you can bond to just about anything. You can bond to an imaginary world or porn, or you can bond to same sex, or you can bond to yourself through masturbation. None of this will ever feel consistently satisfying and you will always need constant stimulation. People in various stages of bonding, or rather addiction, may argue against this in defense.

You see, there is nothing more satisfying than doing what is right. Nothing makes you feel more content, secure, or satisfied. We all know what is right.

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3 thoughts on “Addiction and Sex”

  1. Wow..great post. Its so true you can bond with just about anything. I was headed toward that path of destruction myself. You really have a lot of good information on this blog. I’ll be sure to bookmark and come back often. I just enrolled with Life Star So cal (a treatment program here in Orange County California). and so far it has been awesome. Between their mentorship and the information you have here , I think I’m in good hands! Keep up the great work

  2. In my repentance, as of late, I have awful feelings of profound loneliness that I take to the Lord. I have no idea what I would do with these feelings if I didn’t have Him.

    My eyes are wet as I write this. This is a tremendous struggle and I sure wish I hadn’t started with the porn in the first place. How harmless did it seem to a 13 year old who just found his brother’s magazine under the bed?

    Now that I’m 40 and am going through a very real mid-life crisis, I see exactly what you mean by bonding. I feel that the loneliness I am experiencing is a direct result of the severing of the bond between my true self and my eyes and hands. The pain is incredible.

    Thanks for the website. I’m getting some very good perspectives.

  3. I am a spouse of someone who has had an addiction and led a double life for the last 5 years. He has cheated on me with at least 30 different women. I am just finding all of this out now. I am completely devastated.

    The problem is, I love him. Even though sometimes looking at him makes my stomach turn, and I can’t sleep at night because the nightmares of him and someone else wake me up and then the thoughts keep me awake.

    I think I am deciding to stay with him. After reading countless articles on your website, even though his addiction is slightly different, I can see that he had a problem. When I talk to him, I can see that he has hit rock bottom and he is wanting to change, not for me, but for himself and me.

    I want to thank you for opening yourself and your life up to complete strangers in the hopes that it can save someone else from self-destruction. From all the comments on the articles I can see that you are doing a great thing.

    If you have any advice for spouses, I would really appreciate it. Or if you know someone I could talk to that has been through my side of things that would be great, too.

    Best of luck to everyone out there. Seek help and guidance. There will always be someone who loves you enough to help you be accountable for your actions and help you overcome your weaknesses.

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